Now, I want to believe that I was rather less full of myself when I read this book in 2002 than I was in my earlier years. I had experienced my fair piece of personal and professional struggles, pain, and brokenness. I assumed I had at least encountered an adequate amount of trials and assessments to establish the world did not turn around me anymore. However these 4 words certainly hit me right smack dab in the center of someplace. That “someplace” ended up being a decent location.

You see, the real question meant for most of us is, “What on earth are we here for?” I cannot answer that question for every person, but I would propose that we are either here for a terrific reason or we are here just for the heck of it. Assuming we are here for some superior reason than a chance accident, the following sound question becomes, “What exactly is our purpose?”

I want to take the liberty to encourage you with the insight that our lives symbolize a purpose much greater than our individual personal contentment, joy, or happiness. To quote the book, “The search for the purpose of life has puzzled people for thousands of years. That’s because we typically begin at the wrong starting point – ourselves. We ask self-centered questions like what do I want to be? What should I do with my life? What are my dreams for my future? But focusing on ourselves will never reveal our life’s purpose.”

We’re here to serve.

we’re all writing chapters of our life testimonies — both good and bad. Our actions decide the result of each chapter inside the book. But our book is also about other people.

The insurance trade offers us with an astounding platform to serve. Once we peel back the sheets, we recognize that literally everything we seek to accomplish is directly associated to serving somebody. We serve our prospective purchaser, and we end up having a consumer. We serve our prospective new Agent, and we finish up with an additional member of our family. We serve the Agencies we characterize, and we wind up fostering the health and life of our work setting. The Corporation serves the field force, and we end up having a field force who strives to look after the welfare and profitability of the Company. Every sole dollar of new business sales generated as annualized life premium results from someone SERVING someone else.

we’re here to influence and inspire.

John Maxwell is correct on point when he says that we won’t believe in the leader if we don’t believe in the message. Thriving agencies work on what I refer to as the Law of Attraction. Citizens end up being a part of an business because they believe in it and the message they hear and see. They end up with the wish to want what those in the Business have and believe if they partner with them they can get what they want. Our job is to live out our life of influence and inspiration in such a way that we display HOW to be profitable, and inspire them with the drive to be ready to do what it takes to get in position to win.

The more we appreciate, believe, and accept that it’s not about us, the more we will find ourselves blessed beyond our wildest imaginations. That’s just the way it works.

Stay Strong! Lead On!

Want to know more advice for getting ahead? Check out American Income Life Insurance Company. Here you will find helpful hints at excelling in the workplace and reaching your potential.

Article Source: It’s Not All About You

Our “lower self” or ego-mind tells us to stay safe, that we’re in danger, that it’s not good to take risks; it tells us why we can’t really have what we want. (Ego is on default setting, so this is what we hear most of the time.)

On the other hand, our Higher Self, if we make the effort to tune into it (and it does take intention) will fill us with feelings of love, peace, support, inspiration, expansion, and joy. It will show us visions of what our life could be like if we stepped beyond the restrictive barriers of fear. It will tell us where our greatness lies and that, if we reach for it, it can be ours.

Sometimes these two sources of motivation collide head-on.

When you have a vision of your highest potential, – and of course it’s a stretch for you – your Higher Self will say “Yes! Go forward! All is well. This is what you are here to do. ”

But pretty soon your ego or lower self will probably step on the brakes and say “Wait a minute. Stop! It’s dangerous to go forward. That doesn’t look like such a good idea. And furthermore, you can’t do that because . …” And it will give you very rational and convincing reasons why you can’t do what your soul longs to.

We have to become conscious of these two motivations, these two voices or sources of direction within us. We have to first make them conscious before we can work with them. Most of the time Ego-mind is what we take to be the voice of truth. We are not conscious of it as a voice within us with a particular agenda, which does not have the whole truth.

It is possible to have a dialogue between these two voices. What are the legitimate needs that our ego doesn’t want us to overlook? How is it trying to protect us? But then, where are its fears exaggerated, coming from its own intrinsic sense of lack and emptiness and are not justified?

And what is it costing us when we’re only following our ego’s suggestions and playing it safe? What does it cost us to ignore our Higher Wisdom?

In order to explore these questions, you need to hear both voices. You need to make room for the message of your Higher Self, with its vision of your highest potential, the purpose your soul took form for in this life. This is what inspires you, and lights you up. And this is where your greatest SUCCESS will come from, as well!

When you receive a splendid vision of your highest potential and let it really soak into you, so that you can feel it in every fiber, so that the vision starts taking form and becoming real – that will be what we call a “compelling vision.” We need a truly compelling and wondrous vision of our possibility to turn to when we get discouraged. That vision will keep us motivated to take the steps that lie outside our comfort zone.

And you also need to clearly identify the voices of your fears, limiting beliefs and self-images that stop you and keep you stuck. These negative voices tend to be louder, more repetitive, and very convincing. We tend to think they are telling us the truth, as I said. But when we can identify them as just a part of us, we can turn toward that part and interact with it, soothe it, even heal its worries.

That’s why we need to put our attention on those messages, to bring them to consciousness. And we need really effective tools and techniques so we can proactively dissolve our limiting beliefs and replace them with beliefs that empower us to be all that we can be. This is not as hard as it sounds if you know how.

This is what I base my work on – I call it Receiving and Releasing. Receiving guidance from our soul and Higher Self, and Releasing the blockages of our ego or lower self. First you must uncover the light that shines within you, that wants to come forth and shine in the world. Then, by pinpointing the obstacles that block that light from freely shining, you can release those barriers. When those barriers are released, nothing stands in the way of your soul’s light shining forth and filling the world.

“Let me help you move forward to fully bloom” offers Midlife Empowerment Coach, Tomar Levine. Free three-part Audio Series: Blooming At Midlife with special guest hosts.

Article Source: When Higher and Lower Consciousness Collide

Looking at many people I work and speak with, this is not a matter of choice anymore. They need to lose the interruptions in their lives in order to keep their jobs, pay their mortgages and have at least food on the table.

All this talk about simplicity is not what we need. We don’t need simplicity either.

When I first started to work in my own business, I really was the do-it-all person. I wanted to make a steady income for my family. I wanted to do whatever needed.

You can probably guess the result I got.

Yep, I wasn’t making a lot of money. My mind and activities were too scattered. It was time for something different. I needed to become more focused.

And so I did.

One of the first things was that I focused solely on visual thinking and how this could assist individuals. I always wanted to be there for people, in a personal or a business situation. When you help the individual, you indirectly help the business.

The results of being more focused?

I wrote 2 books in one year
I created two successful online training courses
I trained many (many) people offline in becoming more productive and balanced
I was able to enjoy more free time and spend this with my family
All this would never have been possible if I just simplified my life. I needed to focus and master what I was doing and wanted to do.

What do all of these have to do with mind mapping?

Well… at first probably nothing. In the end, probably nothing. But in between it has a lot to do with visual mapping, mind mapping and summapping.

Here’s why, and here’s how you can benefit from this immediately

When I was doing all those things at the same time, my head sometimes ‘exploded’ with thoughts, ideas and information. This was of course not the focus I needed.

What I did was simple (and it only involves 5 simple steps).

1. I took a big sheet of white paper. I wrote down everything I had in my head (ideas), what I wanted to accomplish (goals) and what I loved to do (passions).

2. I organized the information in such a way that everything in the ‘map’ was located exactly there where it should be. This means my goals and ideas and passions were outlined in several directions. To say this in mindmap words: I created branches with information. Closer to the center means closer to the present. Towards the outside is further into the future.

3. From this I determined which branch could help me in accomplishing what I wanted in life and what could not (the latter is very important to identify).

4. I removed everything except the ‘branch’ or path, as I like to call it, which leads me into my future. This helped me focus.

5. I took ACTION to really get what I wanted.

I had literally removed most of my negative objects out of my life.

From that moment on things became easier. Life was better and clear.

THE RESULT

This is one of the ways I really USE maps in my life AND my business. They work for me (as they should work for you).

A map to me is a tool to get overview in information. It doesn’t matter if this is in studying, project planning or simply getting my priorities straightened out at home.

Do you remember the circle I created to USE maps in the entire process of my activities? Getting more focus is just one of the many real life examples in APPLYING that circle.

It’s a small example for us, yet for many people who are only creating mindmaps to take notes or even grocery lists (…don’t get me started on that) this offers a completely different perspective. The clients I share this with become more productive andremove a lot of mind chatter (or ‘noise’) in their lives.

What will you do with this information?

If you are a person who is already completely focused, you don’t really need this. Your gain from this article is to understand you are focused.

If you feel you lack focus you should use this information… today!

How do you know you are not that focused yet? Hmm, let me see (drawing as well from my own experiences)…

You don’t really know where you are going today and in life
You are easily distracted
You keep reading blog articles which don’t assist you to move forward (just keep on reading my articles)
You don’t really care or are interested in what you do (lack of motivation)
You talk a lot, but don’t take action
If you experience one or more of the ‘lack of focus’ items from the list above… you need to TAKE ACTION.

I was in the fortunate situation that I was in a Mastermind group. After I created the visual map of myself and my life, I received assistance from one of the other members in the Mastermind. Make sure you start to use your mindmap and take action. Ask people to assist you or ask for their advice. It will help you a lot!

“My dreams are worthless, my plans are dust, my goals are impossible.
All are of no value unless they are followed by action.” – Og Mandino

Creating clarity and overview in your information will give you a clear mind. This is vital when you want to create success in your life. When you like to learn more on how you can manage yourself, your environment and how information influences you, have a look at http://MindmapsUnleashed.com

Article Source: 5 Steps To Create Focus In Your Life

Looking at many people I work and speak with, this is not a matter of choice anymore. They need to lose the interruptions in their lives in order to keep their jobs, pay their mortgages and have at least food on the table.

All this talk about simplicity is not what we need. We don’t need simplicity either.

When I first started to work in my own business, I really was the do-it-all person. I wanted to make a steady income for my family. I wanted to do whatever needed.

You can probably guess the result I got.

Yep, I wasn’t making a lot of money. My mind and activities were too scattered. It was time for something different. I needed to become more focused.

And so I did.

One of the first things was that I focused solely on visual thinking and how this could assist individuals. I always wanted to be there for people, in a personal or a business situation. When you help the individual, you indirectly help the business.

The results of being more focused?

I wrote 2 books in one year
I created two successful online training courses
I trained many (many) people offline in becoming more productive and balanced
I was able to enjoy more free time and spend this with my family
All this would never have been possible if I just simplified my life. I needed to focus and master what I was doing and wanted to do.

What do all of these have to do with mind mapping?

Well… at first probably nothing. In the end, probably nothing. But in between it has a lot to do with visual mapping, mind mapping and summapping.

Here’s why, and here’s how you can benefit from this immediately

When I was doing all those things at the same time, my head sometimes ‘exploded’ with thoughts, ideas and information. This was of course not the focus I needed.

What I did was simple (and it only involves 5 simple steps).

1. I took a big sheet of white paper. I wrote down everything I had in my head (ideas), what I wanted to accomplish (goals) and what I loved to do (passions).

2. I organized the information in such a way that everything in the ‘map’ was located exactly there where it should be. This means my goals and ideas and passions were outlined in several directions. To say this in mindmap words: I created branches with information. Closer to the center means closer to the present. Towards the outside is further into the future.

3. From this I determined which branch could help me in accomplishing what I wanted in life and what could not (the latter is very important to identify).

4. I removed everything except the ‘branch’ or path, as I like to call it, which leads me into my future. This helped me focus.

5. I took ACTION to really get what I wanted.

I had literally removed most of my negative objects out of my life.

From that moment on things became easier. Life was better and clear.

THE RESULT

This is one of the ways I really USE maps in my life AND my business. They work for me (as they should work for you).

A map to me is a tool to get overview in information. It doesn’t matter if this is in studying, project planning or simply getting my priorities straightened out at home.

Do you remember the circle I created to USE maps in the entire process of my activities? Getting more focus is just one of the many real life examples in APPLYING that circle.

It’s a small example for us, yet for many people who are only creating mindmaps to take notes or even grocery lists (…don’t get me started on that) this offers a completely different perspective. The clients I share this with become more productive andremove a lot of mind chatter (or ‘noise’) in their lives.

What will you do with this information?

If you are a person who is already completely focused, you don’t really need this. Your gain from this article is to understand you are focused.

If you feel you lack focus you should use this information… today!

How do you know you are not that focused yet? Hmm, let me see (drawing as well from my own experiences)…

You don’t really know where you are going today and in life
You are easily distracted
You keep reading blog articles which don’t assist you to move forward (just keep on reading my articles)
You don’t really care or are interested in what you do (lack of motivation)
You talk a lot, but don’t take action
If you experience one or more of the ‘lack of focus’ items from the list above… you need to TAKE ACTION.

I was in the fortunate situation that I was in a Mastermind group. After I created the visual map of myself and my life, I received assistance from one of the other members in the Mastermind. Make sure you start to use your mindmap and take action. Ask people to assist you or ask for their advice. It will help you a lot!

“My dreams are worthless, my plans are dust, my goals are impossible.
All are of no value unless they are followed by action.” – Og Mandino

Creating clarity and overview in your information will give you a clear mind. This is vital when you want to create success in your life. When you like to learn more on how you can manage yourself, your environment and how information influences you, have a look at http://MindmapsUnleashed.com

Article Source: 5 Steps To Create Focus In Your Life

Looking at many people I work and speak with, this is not a matter of choice anymore. They need to lose the interruptions in their lives in order to keep their jobs, pay their mortgages and have at least food on the table.

All this talk about simplicity is not what we need. We don’t need simplicity either.

When I first started to work in my own business, I really was the do-it-all person. I wanted to make a steady income for my family. I wanted to do whatever needed.

You can probably guess the result I got.

Yep, I wasn’t making a lot of money. My mind and activities were too scattered. It was time for something different. I needed to become more focused.

And so I did.

One of the first things was that I focused solely on visual thinking and how this could assist individuals. I always wanted to be there for people, in a personal or a business situation. When you help the individual, you indirectly help the business.

The results of being more focused?

I wrote 2 books in one year
I created two successful online training courses
I trained many (many) people offline in becoming more productive and balanced
I was able to enjoy more free time and spend this with my family
All this would never have been possible if I just simplified my life. I needed to focus and master what I was doing and wanted to do.

What do all of these have to do with mind mapping?

Well… at first probably nothing. In the end, probably nothing. But in between it has a lot to do with visual mapping, mind mapping and summapping.

Here’s why, and here’s how you can benefit from this immediately

When I was doing all those things at the same time, my head sometimes ‘exploded’ with thoughts, ideas and information. This was of course not the focus I needed.

What I did was simple (and it only involves 5 simple steps).

1. I took a big sheet of white paper. I wrote down everything I had in my head (ideas), what I wanted to accomplish (goals) and what I loved to do (passions).

2. I organized the information in such a way that everything in the ‘map’ was located exactly there where it should be. This means my goals and ideas and passions were outlined in several directions. To say this in mindmap words: I created branches with information. Closer to the center means closer to the present. Towards the outside is further into the future.

3. From this I determined which branch could help me in accomplishing what I wanted in life and what could not (the latter is very important to identify).

4. I removed everything except the ‘branch’ or path, as I like to call it, which leads me into my future. This helped me focus.

5. I took ACTION to really get what I wanted.

I had literally removed most of my negative objects out of my life.

From that moment on things became easier. Life was better and clear.

THE RESULT

This is one of the ways I really USE maps in my life AND my business. They work for me (as they should work for you).

A map to me is a tool to get overview in information. It doesn’t matter if this is in studying, project planning or simply getting my priorities straightened out at home.

Do you remember the circle I created to USE maps in the entire process of my activities? Getting more focus is just one of the many real life examples in APPLYING that circle.

It’s a small example for us, yet for many people who are only creating mindmaps to take notes or even grocery lists (…don’t get me started on that) this offers a completely different perspective. The clients I share this with become more productive andremove a lot of mind chatter (or ‘noise’) in their lives.

What will you do with this information?

If you are a person who is already completely focused, you don’t really need this. Your gain from this article is to understand you are focused.

If you feel you lack focus you should use this information… today!

How do you know you are not that focused yet? Hmm, let me see (drawing as well from my own experiences)…

You don’t really know where you are going today and in life
You are easily distracted
You keep reading blog articles which don’t assist you to move forward (just keep on reading my articles)
You don’t really care or are interested in what you do (lack of motivation)
You talk a lot, but don’t take action
If you experience one or more of the ‘lack of focus’ items from the list above… you need to TAKE ACTION.

I was in the fortunate situation that I was in a Mastermind group. After I created the visual map of myself and my life, I received assistance from one of the other members in the Mastermind. Make sure you start to use your mindmap and take action. Ask people to assist you or ask for their advice. It will help you a lot!

“My dreams are worthless, my plans are dust, my goals are impossible.
All are of no value unless they are followed by action.” – Og Mandino

Creating clarity and overview in your information will give you a clear mind. This is vital when you want to create success in your life. When you like to learn more on how you can manage yourself, your environment and how information influences you, have a look at http://MindmapsUnleashed.com

Article Source: 5 Steps To Create Focus In Your Life

But, at some point resistance starts to set in. Your soul calls you forward to take a big leap, and delivers you a brilliant idea. But eventually your ego starts to kick in. One of the main jobs of the ego is to keep you safe. It puts on the brakes and says, “Hey, wait a minute! I think we ought to think about this more closely so you don’t get hurt or make a mistake.” The process of publishing my book took the better part of 18 months, even though I had a great running start at it.

Learning how to work with and break free from resistance is critical if you want to live an extraordinary life and accomplish your dreams. It’s like trying to drive with one foot on the gas, and the other foot on the brake. Resistance can make us procrastinate, or get wishy-washy in our thoughts and actions. Here are 3 strategies that will help you kick resistance to the curb so you can move ahead with more ease, speed and confidence…
1. Dig Under the Resistance

In my experience, resistance usually comes with important information for you. Resistance doesn’t just come out of nowhere and with no reason. If you notice any signs of resistance, like procrastination or dawdling, stop. Check in to see if there is some reason you may not be fully aware of that is kick-starting the resistance process. Maybe you don’t have all the information you need, or you need to reconnect with the importance of the project you have in front of you.

Action: Instead of stopping in your tracks with resistance, ask yourself “What is underneath this resistance that I might need to pay attention to right now?” Clear that issue up first and you’ll notice your resistance start to melt.

2. Call Upon Your Brilliant Self

Resistance comes up usually when we’re in the process of stepping out of our comfort zone in some way. Whether it’s having a difficult conversation with a loved one, or launching a new business, we need to expand our view of ourselves in order to accomplish our dreams. The resistance comes from the scared ego that is more content to play it safe and small. Rather than letting your Inner Resister run the show, call upon your Brilliant Self to guide you instead.

Action: A great question to help you break free of resistance is, “If I was my most brilliant and confident self, what choice would I make right now?” Let your inner wisdom answer that question and then act from that place.

3. Take Action with the Next Baby Step

The internal battle with resistance and fear can never be resolved by “thinking about it” or bartering with ourselves. Getting into a mental loop of debating and negotiating doesn’t get the foot off the brake, which is what you want. The best way to move through resistance is through physical action of some kind.

Action: Ask yourself, “What is the very next step I can take now to move this project/decision forward?” Take action right away to get back in the flow and leave the resistance behind.

Success Strategist, coach and best-selling author, Carolyn B. Ellis, is the founder of ThrivePrinciples.com, empowering you to thrive no matter what your outside circumstances are. To get free tips on turning adversity into opportunity in order to improve your relationships, increase your self-confidence and reach your highest potential, visit www.ThrivePrinciples.com

Article Source: 3 Ways to Break Free of Resistance

You may now be asking, “Why does setting goals work?”

The answer to this is plainly simple. Setting goals lets a person focus on a particular objective which allows him to exclude other things irrelevant to what he plans to complete. This way, he gets to be aware of the things which matters most and need to be done immediately. He also gets to have a full understanding on how he’d like to achieve them.

Moreover, to further guarantee the affectivity of goal planning, patience and hard work are your keys. Nothing is impossible. Everything is attainable. Yes, there are challenging bumps along the way but these should not hinder and stop you in achieving your dreams.

It may really take much effort to persevere but once you realize things are changing and you start to notice there’s development as you go through your journey to success, rest assured, you’re walking the correct road to victory. Remember, we make our own destiny. And, by saying that, we are responsible to what we are going to be in the future. Yes, no one knows what lies ahead of us, but we walk our own journeys to become what we want to be.

Scheduleyourgoal is your online goal setting guide capable of giving the best service when it comes to achieving your objectives in life. Check out http://www.scheduleyourgoals.com for more details.

Article Source: Set Goals Smartly

Create Positive Vibes
Keeping a positive attitude is very essential in creating positive vibes within you. With a positive atmosphere, you will think of everything as possible. You will learn to convince yourself that nothing will ever be impossible. You will simply boost your being optimistic which is really a huge help to get you closer to success.
If you are so fixed with having success in your life, you will never be scared of trying to do things as long as you have that positive attitude. Here, you are focusing your mind that the result to your actions is positive. Or if a certain plan is not successful, it will never pull you down. Instead, you will accept it as a challenge and a lesson.

Set Up Your Self Confidence
Gaining self confidence is very much related to having a positive attitude. Self confidence lets you face the challenges and give you more willingness to implement your plans to succeed. People who are afraid to try to do things or take chances are those who lack confidence. And 99% of these people can never embrace success in life.
Self confidence is one which enables you to grab every idea that your mind dictates pertaining to success. It is also one which will give you the will and the courage to grab every opportunity that comes along the way. Gaining self confidence is such a very crucial part of following the road to success.

Strong Mindset
Being focus and concentrated with achieving success is as important as those two factors explained earlier. Without a fixed mindset, you tend to lose your track and get lost from the way to success. You will get confused. Many will get discouraged. A number will give up and totally surrender from fighting for success.
However, before working on your mindset, don’t ever forget about improving self esteem. The higher you value yourself, the more you believe that you can do all these. Thinking of your goals and thinking that you have all the capabilities to reach them really involves improving self esteem.
To have a strong mindset, you first need to identify exactly what is it that you want to succeed. You need to closely determine what is success for you and what aspects in life do you really want to become successful with. Write this down and always think of it. Convince yourself that you really can obtain it.
You can tell yourself “I will have this” thousand times. By this, you are creating a fix and strong mindset towards your goal. All may sound simple to you, but everything requires patience, commitment, dedication and sacrifice. Surely sacrifice is quite a heavy word to hear but if you will have that fixed mindset, you will certainly carry it as light as cotton.
Have these key points to success, and you shall never worry about becoming successful in life!

Joy Nev shares her love and passion in enhancing self esteem. You can be sure that her tips and advices will work wonders with your personality development! Join her and get her popular free report on “Key Points to Success!” available at http://www.mindforchange.com.

Article Source: Key Points to Success

Let’s look at a brief summary of pointA dream becomes a goal when you set a time limit for its acquisition. A dream is not rational. It’s not based on your passed achievements. So a dream becomes a goal, it is how you MAKE a goal, but now you have to SET that goal as an instruction for you brain to find.You make a goal from a dream. A dream is not something based on your past accomplishments. It typically does not fall under that category you currently view as “logical”. So you make a goal from a dream, but you SET a goal with ALL OF YOUR BEING! You embody that goal, being so determined to get it, that no person, thing, or circumstance can stop you from achieving it. Only then is it SET as a goal. However, if you have a goal like that, your achievement of it is not only guaranteed, it is impossible that you do not achieve it…because your brain will take you to what you constantly hold within your EMOTIONALIZED THOUGHTS.

The link to the presentation is included in my bio. It is almost 20 mins long, and covers the major points for success and setting goals for achievement.

Dennis Andrew
NNOS Studios Motivational Speaker Division

Here is the YouTube link to the presentation spoken of in the article Motivational Speakers Ohio
Here’s another much shorter presentation that was done in Ohio Motivational Speaker Ohio.

Article Source: Motivational Speaker – Science of Success and Achievement (NNOS Studios of Ohio)

‘When I was drinking I would never look at myself squarely in the mirror,’ says Carmen. ‘I would wake up in the morning, and I’d notice the bags under my eyes, the dehydrated skin – and I would put on more make-up and moisturizer. I would drink orange juice for the hangovers. I was deceiving myself. I was thinking, ‘it’s okay; everybody does it.’

For Stella, the mirror became a reflection of her dissolution. ‘When I was drunk I would look into it and I would say ‘Look, you and I are drunk, but nobody knows about us.’
The very dichotomy of our roles as women is a barrier to seeking treatment. We’re expected to be ladylike, but also independent and in control. Both of these requirements mean it is especially difficult for women to admit to a problem and seek help. Add to that the stigma of alcoholism and it’s no wonder that women wait for many years, decades even, before surrendering to what Carmen terms ‘the gift of desperation’.

Very often women leave it later than men and because alcohol takes a physical toll on women much quicker, they are often quite damaged when they arrive for help.

But there’s only one way to recovery, and it’s not easy. The using of alcohol is never the problem. It’s only when you take the alcohol away that you get insight into why that person needs to use it. Making the ’searching and fearless moral inventory’ required by step four of the 12-step recovery program is a cornerstone of breaking through the addiction, as is the spiritual awareness that is essential to what Stella describes as an ‘evolutionary program on a deep, deep level’.

The spiritual aspect of the 12-step program requires that addicts develop a relationship with a higher power, but as they understand it to be. ‘My higher power is symbolized by a praying mantis,’ says Stella, as she lifts a wire sculpture of a praying mantis. ‘It’s amazing how often they turn up – I find them in my garden, under leaves, in my car…’

Having the support from others, she says, is ‘a power greater than just one’. Alone, Carmen and Stella agree one cannot fight alcohol addiction. They are both continuing to attend their follow-up meetings, to do their daily readings. Says Stella, ‘to believe in something other than money is to be truly free. It’s a password to a phenomenal life, and I have had glimpses of incredible blessedness’.

‘I have to research constantly to keep reminding myself of how-cunning this disease is,’ says Carmen, who says she is finally able to set her own goals and to put her foot down. ‘For the first time in years I’m me again. I can make my own decisions. It’s like a light going on. Within two weeks (after checking in) I knew that my marriage was over. I’m still in the middle of the divorce, but every day I feel better. I’ve learnt to stop blaming others. I see clearly how alcohol destroyed my life, slowly and insidiously; how it made me moody and de-motivated and then depressed. But I’m happy now. I’m getting back into work after 15 years and I’m giving to something and getting something back. I’m not just giving all the time. Every day there is a little more light.’

And while Candice stumbles on in darkness, she ends our call with a promise that she will attend a meeting. ‘I’m going to do it,’ she says. ‘I look at my girls and I wonder what kind of mother I’m becoming.’

Sandra Prior runs her own bodybuilding website at http://bodybuild.rr.nu.

Article Source: How many times do we look at ourselves in the Mirror?